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The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Passion Killers

The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Passion Killers

There is nothing quite like the excitement and thrill of a new relationship. You know that giddy feeling you experience when you are both together, not being able to keep your hands off each other and when you truly, madly, deeply miss your loved one when they aren’t there? Remember that?

Almost every relationship reaches a point where the initial spark starts to fade a bit. If you’ve been married for a few years or are in long-term relationship, it’s quite common for the honeymoon period to wane as you both settle into the relationship. What was once intense, exciting and filled with va va voom becomes calmer, perhaps even a tad dull and boring!

Suddenly, your partner’s most endearing qualities – being chronically late, snoring in his sleep, or not squeezing the toothpaste from the bottom begins to grate on your nerves. Your relationship starts to take strain and the days where you once indulged in long, heady nights of passion, now seem like a lifetime ago. We take a look at the most common passion killers and how you can reignite the spark in your relationship.

1. Weight gain

She’s had a baby or two, and is battling to lose the weight. He’s getting tubby around the jowls and tummy due to too many hours at the desk (not to mention a couch potato lifestyle!) Perhaps, you’ve settled into your relationship and feel you don’t have to make too much effort anymore – after all, you’ve got the girl or the guy! You may also have a poor body image and simply hate the idea that you’ve picked up a few extra kilos even though your partner insists you look great. Not feeling good about your body is one of the top passion deflators – not only because you don’t look good, but because you don’t FEEL attractive either!

What you can do: While you may not always be able to have the body you had when you first started dating – age and hormones does that! – you can start exercising and eating healthily. Join a gym, start walking or running and eating healthy, balanced meals. Extra exercise on its own also helps to pick up the passion – fitter people have a healthier sex drive! 

We all need an extra boost when it comes to losing stubborn kilos and that’s exactly what natural weight loss remedies from the Feelgood Health range will do for you. EcoSlim is a herbal remedy which helps to boost your metabolism and encourage a healthy breakdown of fats in the body. Use EcoSlim together with our natural detox treament, Detox Drops which gets rid of toxins, increases energy and strengthens the immune system.  When you start feeling better about how you look, you also start feeling more confident and sexier which will definitely steam up things in the bedroom!

2. Money worries

According to relationship experts, money worries can ruin your marriage or long-term relationship. It’s the number one problem in many marriages or relationships and also the number one cause of divorce.  Arguments over money can escalate when one spends or earns more than the other, maybe causing bills to be unpaid,  budgets exceeded or resentments to build up. Another common problem is when the division of bills is not equal – if one person in the relationship earns less than the other but ends up paying most of the bills.  Immense strain is also placed on the relationship when one person is not working and the other has to carry the burden of maintaining a household and family. 

What you can do: If money is handled unequally in a relationship, resentment can build quite quickly. This often spills over into the romance department and kill any ounce of passion.  It’s important to be on the same page about your financial situation and how money matters are handled. Be open with each other about your finances and what you intend to achieve together as a couple. If you find yourself in debt or one partner isn’t working, don’t bury your head in the sand and allow the situation fester. Speak to a financial advisor or make arrangements to pay off your debt – working together as a team eases the pressure and also brings people closer together in a crisis. Relationship experts also emphasise that both partners stay financially independent but live within their boundaries.  

3. Lack of romance

A lack of romance in your marriage or love relationship can trigger a host of emotions ranging from irritation, resentment and anger to regret, bitterness, sadness or nostalgia. Women, in particular, often complain that their relationships lack romance or that their partners have no idea what real romance is. In a marriage or long term relationship, couples do tend to find themselves in a comfort zone. Where they once before made an effort to go on dates, dress up, surprise each other or enjoy a special moment, they are now stuck in the same routine and the passion lessens day by da!

What you can do: Relationships are hard work! It’s that simple. You and your partner have to make the effort and work at it. Speak to your partner about your dissatisfaction and how you’d like to change the situation. Bring the excitement and romance back into your relationship by doing something together that you’d both enjoy. It’s pointless if you want to go for a spa treatment and he wants to bungee jump. Hot, sweaty salsa dancing maybe? A weekend away? Keep in mind it’s about the little gestures – breakfast in bed, sending a sexy text, surprising her with flowers or a pair of shoes or arranging that the kids spend the weekend with their grandparents.

4. Sex rut

Fallen into a sex rut? You are not alone! Couples in long term relationships often do. There are a number of reasons why your sex life may have become dull and boring and these include working all day, coming home to cook dinner, helping kids with their homework, doing household chores and feeling too tired to do anything afterwards. Not being in the mood for a night of passion after a hectic day can affect libido and sex drive. Some people often also bring the stresses of their work home too which can affect  sexual performance. Many couples go through the motions of making love – they do it because they think have to but don’t enjoy it or don’t want to disappoint their partner! It then becomes just one more chore!

What to do: Remember when you couldn’t get enough of each other? Stolen moments together, explosive, heated, unbridled passionate lovemaking? It doesn’t mean because you’ve been together for a long time that you can’t still share a passionate love. Sex therapists suggest that you spice things up by having sex in different places, trying new positions, introducing sex toys, wearing something sexy to bed and sending naughty text messages to your partner. If your libido has taken a dip, try Thanda Passion Booster for Women to increase your sex drive and pleasure day and night. For men, our Iqawe is a herbal formula which helps to improve sexual performance, address low libido and erectile dysfunction.

5. Stress

Modern day living brings a lot of stress with it which then filters into the bedroom. If you can’t get into the mood because you’re worried about work, your child battling at school, or all the things that you have to do the next day, you need to work on reducing your stress levels. Sex is a great stress reliever and perhaps, just what you need to get rid of all those pent up emotion!+

What to do: Feeling stressed is not good for your health and your relationship. Find ways to relieve your stress – hit the gym, have a massage, listen to relaxing music or watch a comedy show. The most important thing here is to address the problem before it spirals out of control. In the Feelgood Health range, our PureCalm is a herbal remedy which reduces stress, anxiety and tension. All you need is a few doses to feel better immediately! Best of all, PureCalm does not come with the risk of addiction or unwanted side effects, unlike prescription drugs for anxiety, stress or mood disorders. 

6. Hygiene Issues

Personal cleanliness in relationships is a common issue that crops up as a passion killer. Body odour, bad breath, smelly or dirty nails can all be a definite turn off in any relationship. It is very hard to be attracted to someone who is smelly and even harder when you have to get up close and personal.  This could be a major deal breaker in any relationship!

What to do: Speaking to your partner about  hygiene habits can be extremely difficult. No one likes to be told that the reason you aren’t attracted to them is because they have BO or their breath smells. Handle the conversation as sensitively as possible and offer to help find a solution. Be sure to reassure your partner of your love but that you need certain changes for their comfort as well as yours. An evening shower, good dental hygiene and regular changes of clothing, as well as more attention to personal hygiene and grooming can make all the difference! In the Feelgood Health range, have a look at HaliTonic (a homeopathic remedy for bad breath or halitosis) and Sweatless (for excessive sweating) – both natural remedies that can help.

If you have any health-related questions, please contact us or leave a comment below for FREE advice. We always love hearing from you!
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